Silchari Stamerer.
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Life as a Stamerer is hhharrd.
«on:
01/16/02 at 12:28:50 » |
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:'(I am stamerer and I am finding it hard to talk to people. I have tried several therapies but all to no avail. People sometime laugh at me, when I speak, making me feel very self-conscious. But I can’t help it I have to speak. We are not all perfect. But it seems local people don’t understand this. Also I am shy to speak to Girls, who I know will laugh at me. I don’t think I ever can get married.
Please tell me what I should do! Please I am not joking, help me. I feel half-human because of my speech problem. It makes it worse when people are not understanding how I feel.
:'( |
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Subhro
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Re: Life as a Stamerer is hhharrd.
«on:
01/19/02 at 01:15:40 » |
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I am one of your kind man. I used to stutter too (I still do to sometimes), and sometimes, it used to be a nightmare. But I guess now I have control over it.
But to tell you the truth, I had realized long ago, that I have to live with it. So why not forget about it and get along with life. Try to exploit other qualities that you have. Qualities which will overshadow this problem that we got. And I did get along with life. Now I don't give a D*A*M*N S*H*I*T about this problem. None at all.
You know what, if you can not take the risk of being laughed at, you can never get over it. Come on, who the hell gives a S*H*I*T if people laugh at you. So, go speak wherever required without any kind of apprehension. You know, its WHAT you say, and NOT HOW you say that matters.
I have to interact with people all the time, and that too in a language thats not my own. And I can manage it quite well. I know it will be kind of hard, but you can not afford to be like that forever. Take the risk, you will do it.
And about 'getting married', ha ha... thats funny, there will be a lot of girls who will come your way.. So dont bother about that... and try to make it big in life.... |
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GEE , bon voyage!
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Re: Life as a Stamerer is hhharrd.
«on:
01/20/02 at 09:52:36 » |
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No doubt about that...as Shoubhro is findint it out these days...lotsa femme fatales comin his way...and also finding their ways... ;D if the grapevines are to be believed ...well there are quite a few o them...also this guy has a special affinity for the calamity ravaged states of the country ...aka earstwhile Utkal ;D donno whether that has been inspired by the gene of Asoka ...but than getting to mature confabulations....Silchari Stammerer...life is kind o hard ...as you say...but then you can take a cue from Subhro...who despite being one o your kind...has stormed his way through the gibes of people...and believe me he is the best in what he does....so mate....care now what the others think o you...care not a fig for the disparaging efforts of others...its not your stammering that will speak for you...rather your actions will...and just dont stammer with your actions...and am sure you will have a wonderful life...
and to GEE BON ...keep your yankee style to yourself...or elsee ...salee pol khuul dunga teraa ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
am sure you arent in two minds as to who lies beneath.
chow ....oops...sayanora.
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Shamim
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Re: Life as a Stamerer is hhharrd.
«on:
01/21/02 at 05:08:56 » |
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Hey friend, I was quite saddened to read your problems that you experience. You are quite a brave person to express your feelings to everyone, I think you’re an highly intelligent person, expressing your emotions and seeking emotional support from other people, due to you low self esteem. I agree with Subhro. But you shouldn’t feel negative that some people stupidly laugh at you when you stammer, just ignore these idiots, who are making you feel bad. These childish idiots must understand not make bad comments or laugh when a person has difficulty in speaking.
You say that you find it hard to speak to Girls, but you should know that some Girls are more understanding and mature than other silly Girls, who expect every Boy to speak in nice perfect romantic way like in Hindi films! Some Girls can understand your problem and like to know your real personality, which is the main factor in the relationship. If you don’t have a nice personality the birds won’t come near you, man. So what you stammer, the Women are looking at how behave, your kindness, sense of humour and others, not just how you talk. A fluent person without a good personality would not be successful in pulling a Girl.
You’re thinking about your marriage and how your future wife would cope with you, think positive. If you’re nice person, she will love you to death, but if you’re unkind and nasty, she will flee, no matter how well you speak. So come on lad, cheer up, and get on with life, start by checking some local delicacies, you would be surprised how some babes will love you. 8)
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Silchari Stamerer
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Re: Life as a Stamerer is hhharrd.
«on:
01/21/02 at 09:19:32 » |
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I am quite encouraged by your helpful comments especially by Shamim. But you can’t make some people understand that stammers are like normal people. As for marriage, who would give their pretty daughter to me, unless I am very rich. They will think that my kids will also stutter.
Some families gave me indication not to speak to their children, in case they pick up my stutter, as though I carry a dangerous virus! I felt so humiliated and bad. Sometime I wish I could ……die! Life is a struggle for me, some day I may not keep up the struggle and disappear from this cruel and selfish land. Vidaata made a mistake by creating us sttammmmers!
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Rupam Das
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Re: Life as a Stamerer is hhharrd.
«on:
01/22/02 at 06:06:10 » |
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well silchari stammerer...everyone ofus lives with cartain fallibilities inherent to ourselves...just that some are explicit...wwhile some are clandestine...some are apparent while some are not...the idea is to try and ride over these...while some of these are kind of surmountable...there are quite a large number, which are not easy to get rid of...and certainley stammering is one of these...but that does not mean that we should not try to overcome this...I actually know of quite a few people who stammer...who kind of find it difficult to speak their minds at one go...might sound a little rude...but this is certainley something in the negative...but by no means this is a criterion upon which someone can be ostracized...
and what if people do not want you to talk to their folks? its nothing that you should be worried about...rather its they who should for once...stop living on the surface...and try to throw their parochialism to the winds...personally speaking...I do not know of a single person who would have shown this kind of an attitude...hey do not talk to my son...for you stammer...and he might as well pick that up...if you know of someone who does this...then brother...next time tell that person ...dear sir, it is high time you took a deeper view of life...and try and get your thought process working...I am sure you do not stammer in your thoughts...and if your thoughts are sound...well then there are certainley some other secondery modes of expressing them.
And talking of humiliation...well we get humiliated only if we know that the people who are inflictin that out to us are...as in their own rights...at least sane...if people can nourish such insular ideas...as those that you have spoken about...then there should be no reason why YOU should feel an insult coming out of such people...they are by no means capable of humiliatin you...because they themselves are an insult to this civic structure.
Talking of your concerns over exchanging the 'I dos'...well that actually will come later...for the time being ...you need to get your confidence back...and isolate it from gettingshattered by the battering rams of some very very flimsy people...ones who do not have even the faintest thought process going inside them.
As an example subhro would be the best point in citation...have been knowing him for about a decade now...1993 ...and he was a hardcore stammerer...1995 ...he was consciously working at it...halfway through his graduation...he kind of caused the stammering demon to run out of steam...1999 and new people meeting him would not have found any deficiency in the way he spoke...and 2001 he had already put the issue in the backburner...its all about confidence...rather its only about confidence...once you have that...and once you know that you are morally and mentally equal to the people around you...then these attempts to pull you down would not even bother you a tinge...do whatever you do with all your might...am sure people will come to leran to respect you as a person...and once you command that...boy! the ride is goin to be real smooth.
all the best. |
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nazia
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Re: Life as a Stamerer is hhharrd.
«on:
01/22/02 at 06:46:50 » |
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dear ss
if u really want to be happy and self confident u should have don't care attitude towards those people who make fun of you or insult you.everyone out here has got some problem noone is perfect out here but some bunch of idoits don't understand this and tend to make fun of others as if they r perfect.
life is of course a struggle but then we have only one short life to enjoy . |
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Shamim
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Re: Life as a Stamerer is hhharrd.
«on:
01/22/02 at 09:05:51 » |
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Brother, I am now concerned about your well being, since you have expressed a desire to die?? Please pull your self together and stand up to those animals who deeply hurt you emotionally. You say that some families discourage you speaking to their children, then stand up to these fcuks. Tell them straight to their face, never to say such evil things. I agree with nazia and Rupam that you should be more confident.
Yes, life can be a struggle, man, but you should rise to meet them. I wish I could help you more. Take care of yourself. :)
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B_Arup
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Re: Life as a Stamerer is hhharrd.
«on:
01/28/02 at 02:47:26 » |
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Consultation & continuous sitting with speech therapists has resolved stammering problems to a great extent.
However good speech teherapists are not available in Northeast and in Silchar I am not sure whether any such expert exists.
Donot loose heart friend ,people are living and not letting their hope to die with Cancer even |
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